Calm Abiding Meditation

There are two main forms of meditation taught by most traditions, Calm Abiding Meditation and Insight Meditation. As the name implies, Calm Abiding is aimed at calming and stabilizing the mind, resulting in a more open, expansive, and stable awareness, while also developing our mental faculties, including clarity, objectivity, focus, concentration, patience, fortitude, self- awareness, impulse control, and mental and emotional stability. But the higher aim of Calm Abiding is to gain mastery over our conscious awareness, which includes learning to develop and sustain higher mental and meditative states of mind.

When hearing the term awareness, a variety of meanings might come to mind. This often confusing term can refer to different concepts depending on whether it’s used in a medical, scientific, philosophical or conversational context. Additionally, it's often used interchangeably with terms like consciousness, attention, focus, and perception. Buddhism however has a refreshingly easy way of defining awareness, as well as its synonymous terms. It understands them simply as ‘knowers’. Meaning, they all pertain to knowing ourselves and our surrounding environment.

In Calm Abiding, an object of meditation is used to anchor and stabilize our focused attention. The most common object of meditation is the inflow and outflow of the breath, but additional objects like mantras, counting, a statue, image, candleflame, emotion, sensations, or even the mind itself can also be used. By placing and holding our awareness on our breath we gather and stabilize it. The term calm abiding pertains to both the practice as well as the final attainment. But what’s truly remarkable is what happens when we bring together, unify, and stabilize our attention and awareness. We discover and experience an amazing state of mind referred to as presence, also known as present moment awareness.

“To gain control over our awareness – is to gain control over our minds, To gain control over our minds - is to gain control over our lives.”
– Venerable Tarpa

Presence

In Calm Abiding, our initial aim is to discover and abide in the mental state of presence, also known as present moment awareness. Presence is a state of mind that is fully aware and engaged in the present moment, in the ‘here and now’, without being lost in thought or distraction. It’s a focused state of open awareness, of reduced mental commentary, evaluation, and emotional reactivity. A mental state in which we shift our awareness from the doing mind, to the observing mind. This is a way of ‘being’ that fully accepts the present moment just as it is. It’s a dimension of mind that’s deeper than thought and free of mental distraction. It’s a shift in perception in which we become the observing witness to the present moment, without the mind getting lost in thinking about the past or future. It’s the calm beneath our anxieties; the spaciousness beneath our busyness; and the equanimity beneath our contention. Presence is often first discovered in meditation, within the tranquil space that exists between thoughts. A space that is free of mental chatter, compulsion, and need. With practice we can learn to expand and broaden the space between our thoughts, creating an amazingly spacious, and calm state of mind.

Understanding the present moment

Conventionally, we all accept the existence of the three times – past, present, and future. However, when examined, we find that the present moment is the only time that we’re able to experience and interact with. Whatever we do or have done, we did it in the present moment. Meaning, this morning when you ate breakfast, at that time, you were enjoying your porridge in the present moment – It only became the past after the fact, when the experience was rendered to memory. The fact is, the past and future, although real, exist only as mental constructs, with the past existing through memories, and the future existing through mental projection. In other words, the present moment is the only time we engage with and directly experience life. It’s also the only time in which we can effect change. Everything you have ever done, or will do, will be performed in the present moment. But sadly, most of us spend a great deal of our time lost in thoughts of the past and future and rarely experience the fullness and richness of the present moment.

After contemplating this, the present moment may begin to look different. Instead of three equally distinct times, you may begin to feel that there is only the present moment. You may start to see the present moment as infinite, as one vast moment stretching from your birth to your death. However, the present moment began long before you were born, and will continue long after you’re gone. The universe came into existence in the present moment. The earth was formed in the present moment. And one day, the earth will cease to exist in the present moment.

Presence naturally brings an open objectivity that allows for clarity, insight, and space. Objectivity can be defined as, observation free of bias or personal feelings. Objectivity can be cultivated by differentiating and separating our observations of events from our feelings about those events, observing openly without bias. Feelings are then managed at a later point, which helps to keep us rational and less reactionary. For me, presence and the objectivity it brings, feels like becoming a camera lens, which takes in the world exactly the way it is, without bias, interpretation, or judgment.

Objective distance

Another aspect of presence is the quality of objective distance, which can be understood as the recognition of the inherent space in every moment. The space between the observer and the observed, the doer and the activity, the feeling and the experience, and the stimuli and reaction. This space, when cultivated, allows room for wisdom and skills to be applied, while also helping to reduce anxiety and emotional reactivity. It’s important to understand that objective distance is not detachment, which is the avoidance of emotional or social engagement; but instead, it’s learning how to abide in a more objective reality.

Doctors have long known of the benefits of keeping an objective or professional distance between themselves and their patients, allowing for a greater level of effectiveness in their judgment and treatment. Good parenting also requires the application of distance, so that children can learn to be self-reliant. The truth is, we use objective distance every day but are rarely aware of it. We use it to manage our relationships–evaluating how close or far we hold others. We also use distance to regulate our experiences–holding desirable and undesirable experiences at their appropriate distance.

However, Buddhism utilizes objective distance in a more comprehensive way, applying it to our relationship with reality itself. A fundamental problem in our lives is the way we experience reality so closely there is no room to think, breathe, or make wise choices, causing us to live in a state of intense immediacy, urgency, and busyness, as if our faces were smashed up against the window-glass of reality. To remedy this, we become present, which can be accomplished by simply focusing fully upon the breath, which anchors us in the present moment. Becoming present creates a slight distance between ourselves and our reality, serving as an antidote to over-reactivity, relentless thinking, and worrying, while giving us the space to apply wisdom and skills in our lives.

The experience of presence

Beyond the technical explanation of presence lies the actual experience. Within presence, when our complete attention is gathered and stabilized fully on the present moment – a remarkable thing begins to happen. The thought process begins to lessen, along with the intense immediacy and busyness that normally plagues us. As we gain liberation from the constant stream of thought that usually occupies our minds, the mind becomes extraordinarily spacious and peripheral. A profound sense of aliveness, spaciousness, and peace is felt, along with a felt backing away from the world. Time seems to slow, as feelings of equanimity increase. There’s a calming and felt reduction in one’s mental and physical speed and a shift in perception as one’s inner-world and outer-world come into balance and harmony.

Stillness

At deeper levels of presence lies the mental state and experience of stillness, which can be understood as, the stilling or quieting of the mind and emotions. When we talk about stilling the mind and emotions, we are talking about stopping the mind and emotions from running amuck, a state of mind referred to as the monkey mind, a mind constantly searching and grasping at whatever is interesting or desired. Stillness, also termed equanimity, is the transcendence of the constant pushing and pulling of existential anxiety and laxity that plagues our lives. Stillness is a stronger and more profound experience of presence, and is often accompanied by feelings of great bliss. Bliss can be understood as a mental state of unsurpassable joy, experienced as waves of euphoric pleasure that arise, radiate, and wash over you, a state referred to as rapture. If we take a moment and sit silently (long silent pause), you can observe the stillness within this very moment. A stillness that has always been here, before the house you’re in was built, before the country you’re in was formed, even before humankind walked on this planet, this stillness was here, and always will be. Even in the middle of the most chaotic city, underneath all the chaos, confusion, and ‘doing’, stillness is there. Stillness is ‘real’ and can be perceived and felt. However, because of our mental busyness we are rarely aware of it. The state of stillness is one of the most therapeutic, rejuvenating, and pleasurable states that can be experienced. Both presence and stillness are cultivated through the practices of meditation and mindfulness.

Distractions

The biggest challenge to meditation and mindfulness is working with distractions. We all have had the experience, you’re focused on your breath and having a lovely meditation, then out of nowhere you find yourself thinking about a problem at work or what you might want for dinner. In meditation we refer to these as distractions. External distractions like a dog barking, a noisy neighbor, insects, or weather; and internal distractions like thoughts, impulses, strong emotions, anxiety, sleepiness, and physical discomfort. Working with external distractions can be relatively straightforward, by employing practical, everyday solutions – like finding a quieter time or place to practice, buying some noise cancelling headphones, or discovering your preferred position for meditation. We can also work with external distractions by learning to reduce our reaction to them. However, working with internal distractions can be more challenging.

Distractions arise as a natural aspect of the mind

According to Buddhism, the mind’s natural inclination is to seek out happiness. This can be observed in how the mind constantly searches for things it perceives as interesting, pleasurable, beneficial, or protective—anything it believes will bring happiness. This can be experienced firsthand, by sitting quietly and observing your own mind. As you do so, you'll begin to notice how your mind continuously scans both its external and internal environments, shifting its focus from one object to another in the pursuit of greater sources of interest and happiness. So naturally, when the mind becomes bored during meditation, its response is to seek out or create more interesting or pleasurable experiences. Because they’re deemed unwanted during meditation, we call them distractions. These obstacles to our meditation usually manifest as thoughts, fantasies, memories, including plotting and planning.

Working with distractions

One method of working with distractions is to cultivate a pleasurable and comfortable environment for the mind. We do this by focusing on, cultivating, and sustaining any virtuous, pleasant, interesting, or pleasurable sensations. This can include any warm or pleasant sensations in the body, or any pleasurable emotions, or pleasurable mental states. We can also accomplish this by keeping our meditation interesting by encouraging an attitude of curiosity and enthusiasm. Taking great and detailed interest in how your mind and meditation works, while staying inspired by keeping in mind your practice goals and motivations. Another useful technique is to actively celebrate any achievements in your practice, no matter how small they may be. For example, when you’ve noticed your mind has wandered away from your breath, take a moment to celebrate the success of recognizing the distraction before returning your focus to your breathing. Even when you think your meditation isn’t going well, celebrate that you at least made it to the cushion and are doing your best to work with it. By keeping your meditation positive, pleasurable, and interesting, your mind will not seek out interest elsewhere. I often envision working with my mind as if I was training a puppy – with great love, patience, care, and joy.

Thought and thinking

Of course, one of the greatest distractions is uninvited thinking. But with practice, we can slowly begin to gain control over the thought process, or more appropriately the thinking process. Here, a distinction needs to be made between thought and thinking. Thought, is a natural byproduct of the mind which arises naturally from mental imprints and internal and external experiences; whereas thinking, is the intentional or habitual act of operating those thoughts. In its best scenario, thinking is focused on achieving goals and finding solutions (creating, working, communicating, learning, or helping others). In its worst scenario, thinking can be an uncontrollable habit that often torments the thinker through relentless thought, much of it negative. This type of uncontrollable, incessant, and often senseless habitual thinking is often likened to a hamster on a wheel, on which the rodent mindlessly never stops running. However, with practice, Calm Abiding Meditation can help to lessen or even eradicate these habitual or negative aspects of the thinking process. Through meditation, we gain mastery over the mind and thinking process, giving us the freedom to choose what to think or even to not think at all.

"The goal of meditation is not to control your thoughts, but to stop letting your Thoughts control you."
– Unknown
“Leave your front door and your back door open. Allow your thoughts to come and go. Just don’t serve them tea.”
– Shunryu Suzuki

Noting or labeling

One of the most useful tools for working with the mind is the practice of noting – labeling or making mental notes. We use noting to help stabilize our concentration. It’s also used to recognize and highlight different aspects of our mind and mental states. This includes helping us to discern and understand the various types of distractions that arise within our practice. The way noting works, while in meditation, when you notice your attention has wandered away from your breath and into thinking, you recognize it and silently note it ‘thinking’ , you then bring your attention back to your breath while silently saying ‘meditating’, to reestablish your meditation. Noting is repeated as much as needed in order to keep your awareness stable on our object of meditation.

Experiences arising from consistent practice

As you become proficient at meditation, various experiences can arise, experiences of cognitive and sensory clarity, of no-thought, non-conceptuality, and even experiences of selflessness or egolessness. However, you shouldn’t become attached to experiences. There shouldn’t be any overtly creating, projecting, grasping, or anticipating of specific results when meditating. It’s for this very reason, that traditionally, experiences that arise from meditation are not shared with the novice. Meditation needs to be open, objective, and organic; without agenda, striving, or preconceptions. Meditation must be fresh and new every time you sit down; and besides applying the basic meditation technique, you should sit as an open observer without trying to influence the meditation experience.

What to Expect from Your Meditation Practice

It's important to understand that unseen benefits are always occurring regardless of how well you’re able to stay focused on your breath. The calmness cultivated in meditation profoundly benefits the mind in countless subtle ways, one of those being the cultivation of patience, and the other being clarity. In the beginning, besides feeling calmer and more content, the effects of meditation aren’t always apparent. It takes a fair amount of practice before the mind and body become supple enough to experience richer benefits. This often leaves the meditator sitting impatiently waiting for “something” to happen. However, once the body can sit comfortably, and the mind can remain equanimous for an extended amount of time, then the true benefits begin to emerge. Many meditators say that after a long, comfortable meditation, their minds feel wonderfully stable, healthy, and calm. It’s at this point that meditation becomes a very pleasant experience that is deeply enjoyable, and establishing a consistent practice becomes much easier.

Initially, when first starting to meditate, the mind is thrown into chaos, for meditation is often counter to the mind’s habitual workings. In the beginning, the mind feels starved of experience because it is accustomed to a constant stream of stimuli. Because of this, the mind begins trying to create its own experiences, generating images, sensory experiences, emotions, and of course a diverse assortment of thoughts. Distractions are also generated in the body, felt as itching, discomfort, or pain. Generally, these should be seen as inconsequential, for once you have established a stable practice, and the mind and body finally become comfortable, these distractions lessen and a base for actual meditative experience is created. However, you should never push through pain or torment yourself by setting unrealistic practice goals, which will only create an aversion to practice. Benefits and experiences of meditation come sooner for some then others, for there are many factors at work: a person’s temperament, aptitude, attitude, environment, and practice consistency.

It’s important to understand and accept that every time you sit to meditate, the experience is different. One day your session may be highly productive, the next day sleepy and unrewarding. One day you feel like you could meditate uninterrupted for hours, other times you have problems sitting for a few minutes. Regarding this, it’s essential that your meditation practice be devoid of judgment. You must accept that each meditation session is new and unique from all others, and that within each session, you simply sit and explore the current condition of your mind. Whether this session is anxious or sleepy is OK, you accept it and explore it, understanding that there are no good or bad sessions. With every mental state you explore, either positive or negative, you learn more about yourself. It’s through this exploration of your mind and habits that you find antidotes to obstacles in your practice. Therefore, although some meditation sessions may be more challenging to work with, you should deem them all as useful.

Signs of success in your meditation practice

In the beginning, the measure of success can be simply feeling more calm, stable, and content. At higher levels, success can be seen as:

Advice on Meditation

When first beginning to meditate, it’s often hard to sit and focus for any prolonged length of time. Therefore, the aim should be to slowly habituate yourself to this new practice. This is accomplished by engaging in short, frequent sessions of five to ten minutes throughout the day. If it becomes tiresome, stop and feel good about the amount you've done. By keeping your meditations short, light, and pleasurable, they will become something you look forward to, and learn to deeply enjoy. It’s the quality of your meditation that’s important, not the duration of each session. As you gain experience and your mind and body become more supple, you’ll naturally want to stay longer in that state. The secret to success, is the more you touch or engage with the mental state of meditation, the easier it becomes to enter and be productive in that state.

“The chief criterion for determining the length of one’s meditation sessions is the quality of one’s awareness during the practice. Five minutes of finely conducted meditation is worth more than an hour of low-grade conceptual chatter.”
– Allen Wallace

If you want to experience real benefits, it’s important to develop a consistent practice, at least two sessions daily, once in the morning and again in the early evening. Missing even one session can significantly set back any progress. For beginners, ten-minute meditations are perfect. For the intermediate, twenty-minute meditations work well, or a fifty-minute combination of, twenty-minutes sitting, ten-minutes walking, followed by another twenty-minutes sitting. For the advanced practitioner, one hour meditations twice a day are commonly prescribed. It’s said the best time for meditating is in the morning when the mind is clear, and the stomach is empty. But it’s important to discover what works best for you. For myself, I’m a night owl and find early evening the most powerful time for meditation.

All productive meditation begins with a proper intention and clearly defined aim

It’s true, our intention is the most significant aspect in cultivating fruitful meditation. Therefore, generating a positive and alert mental state, while being clear about our aim and intentions, is the first and most advantageous aspect of each session. Generating the proper intention is easily accomplished by taking a moment to reflect on and appreciate our practice. Another tip is to smile while meditating. It doesn’t matter if it’s genuine, just applying the gesture will begin to improve your disposition. Within our meditation, we must come to terms and befriend our practice; falling in love with the beauty, contentment, and silence created, entering our meditation as if slipping into a hot bath.

“Breathing in, I calm my body and mind. Breathing out, I smile. Dwelling in the present moment I know this is the only moment.” – Thich Nhat Hanh

Here is a visualization that helps to establish a productive attitude for working with the mind.

Imagine you’re paper training a puppy. Everyone knows that puppies are too small to scold or spank, so instead, you train them through habituation, using great care and love. You begin by setting the puppy on the paper and when the puppy begins to wander off (which is inevitable) you gently and patiently pick the puppy up and return it to the paper. You do this over and over again, and eventually the puppy habituates the new training. Imagine your mind is like a puppy and you are training it in the same way, slowly and methodically, with great care, patience, and love. In this same way, when in meditation, place your awareness on your breath; when you notice it has wandered, gently and patiently return it to your breathing. You do this over and over again, without judgment. Eventually, with enough time and patience, the mind is slowly tamed and becomes habituated to the new practice.

Keep your practice personal

Always keep in mind that this is your mind and your practice – make it personal. You must explore meditation for yourself and discover how it best works for you, eventually cultivating your own personal style of practice based on many hours of experience on the cushion. For as our minds are unique to each one of us, so too our meditation must be.

Just let go

Probably the best advice pertaining to meditation is to, ‘just let go’. To let go of our busyness, ambition, striving, judgment, anxiety, doubt, desires, etc. This includes letting go of our constant thirst for stimulation, excitement, and new experiences. I heard this adage when I was first introduced to meditation, and now over three decades later, it remains the most concise, comprehensive, and penetrating advice for meditation practice I have ever come across.

How to maintain a consistent meditation practice.

Consistent daily practice is often the secret to success. However, for some it may feel constrictive. My advice for those who feel this way, is to not follow meditation instruction rigidly. Try to approach your meditation with an explorative and fun attitude and make sure to try new styles and techniques. Difficulty maintaining a consistent practice often arise from how we view our efforts. Instead of seeing meditation as just one more chore on your long list of healthy things to do, see it as a short timeout from your busy day. A chance to gather your thoughts and energy and revitalize yourself. See your meditations as fresh starts throughout your day. Lastly, if you find consistent meditation particularly difficult, this could mean two things. On one hand, it could be a sign that you’re in need a consistent practice – that you need to cultivate some distance from the worries and complexities that prohibit you from sitting still for a handful of minutes each day. On the other hand, sometimes when practitioners have difficulty establishing a consistent meditation practice, it's because their minds might not be ready. Often, after working with the mind through other practices and study, practitioners are then more successful. It’s important to know that meditation is not a requirement in the spiritual path. In fact, there are a vast array of practices to choose from, including mindfulness, study, training in virtue, contemplation, as well as walking and standing forms of meditation.

“Meditation should be approached as an artform, the art of ‘being.”
– Venerable Tarpa

Obstacles and Antidotes to Meditation

Traditionally, Buddhism asserts two outlines of obstacles and antidotes, the five hindrances and five antidotes; and the five faults and eight antidotes; both pertain to meditation as well as practice in general.

Understanding the obstacles to meditation

In meditation (and in life), we exist within a mental/emotional spectrum between anxiety and laxity which are our main obstacles to inner peace. In the middle, between these two extremes, lies the state of equanimity, a state of mind that is at peace with itself and the present moment. Unseen to most, there is a constant pushing and pulling between these two extremes that underlines our lives. Through the practice of meditation and mindfulness, we become aware of this oscillating tension and learn how to transcend it and abide in the spacious peace and contentment that lies between them.

Box Breathing

As shared previously; by focusing on and working with the breath, we calm and stabilize the mind. It’s interesting that whether the mind is anxious or dull, the same breathing techniques can be used. One useful technique is called box breathing – like the four equal sides of a box, this cyclical breathing method consists of four equal parts. Start by: 1. breathing in through your nose, 2. hold it for a moment, 3. exhale through your mouth, 4. hold again. Each part should be of equal length. You can do as many cycles of this technique as needed to either calm an anxious mind or arouse a dull mind.

Anxiety

felt as restlessness, worry, busy/speedy/racing mind, boredom, being overly- emotional, or an inability to sit still. Antidotes – while in meditation, try lowering your gaze; use our box breathing technique; bring your awareness to the felt sensation of the body, which grounds us in the present moment; reflect on your practice aims and motivations; practice in a darker room; meditate on joy, stillness, and loving-kindness; don’t fight it – acknowledge, accept, and befriend the anxiety; reset your practice by reapplying our seven-point meditation checklist.

Laxity

felt as dullness or sleepiness, lacking vitality, inspiration, or motivation. Antidotes – while in meditation, try maintaining a proper posture; use our box breathing technique; have your eyes half-open; raise your gaze; reflect on your practice aims and motivation; visualize a bright light or shining object; practice on an empty stomach; practice in a bright room or outside; do short frequent sessions; practice at the times you are most alert; reset your practice by reapplying our seven-point checklist; take a nap, exercise, or shower before meditation; utilize caffeine; practice standing and walking meditation.

Mind wandering

– is the mind’s propensity to get lost in thought and thinking of the past or future; caused by mindlessness, lack of focus, and forgetfulness. Mind wandering is the inclination of the mind to seek out greater objects of interest, pleasure, and happiness. This can be observed by sitting still and watching the mind. As the mind gets bored it will start to cycle its attention around the room, searching for objects of greater interest. This also happens internally, with the mind searching through thoughts, memories, and fantasies. Antidotes – Focusing on the breath and body, and utilizing noting are the two main antidotes. Also try focusing stronger on your object of meditation, engaging in it fully.

Pain, discomfort, itching, and numbness

– These are common obstacles to practice that all practitioners must deal with. SBT favors quality over quantity, meaning, it’s the quality and comfort of your meditation that’s important, not the duration of each session or the following of strict methods. A short, deeply engaged meditation is far more beneficial than an hour of conceptual chatter while forcing yourself to sit in discomfort. We also have to keep in mind, as mentioned previously, when first starting to meditate, the mind often creates experiences, both mental and those generated in the body, felt as pain, discomfort, itching, and other sense experiences. Generally, once you have established a stable practice, these experiences lessen and a base for actual meditation experience is created. However, you should never push through pain or numbness; neither should you torment yourself by setting unrealistic practice goals, which will only create an aversion to practice. Antidotes – while in meditation, initially, don’t apply an antidote too soon. Stay with the sensation briefly to examine and experience it fully. Ask yourself, is the sensation real or imagined? What does the sensation feel like? Where does it reside? What’s its nature? Is it constant or does it come and go? Once you have some understanding and clarity, you can then act, by moving, adjusting, itching, stretching, switching sitting positions, or taking a break. Take it slow and be patient, usually, your body and mind will slowly adapt and become more supple as it gets accustomed to meditating. Once you have some experience, challenging yourself to sit a bit longer while moving less, is always productive, however, it should always be approached slowly and gently. Discomfort and pain does not promote productive meditation.

Negativity

– felt as unhappiness, sadness, worry, insecurity, or fear. Meditation is about exploring and learning about ourselves, and sometimes that includes aspects of ourselves that can be uncomfortable to face. It’s through learning and understanding all the various aspects of ourselves that we awaken and become whole. Antidotes – first accept that this is a natural and normal aspect of practice while acknowledging the benefits in exploring and coming to terms with these qualities; recognize that meditation is a safe environment to explore them. When working with these qualities do so in a soft, nurturing, and gentle way. Be patient, but if the experience becomes too intense then back off, take a break, or change the focus of your meditation to goodness, positivity, or loving-kindness.

Meditation vs. vegetation

– ‘vegetation’ is a term we coined for a style of practice in which we fall into a habit of dull and unproductive meditation. A style lacking the clear, alert, and bright awareness used in proper meditation. It’s to mechanically follow instructions without authentically engaging in the practice. A state of mind lacking the inquisitive and engaged introspection that characterizes productive meditation. Antidotes – while in meditation, cultivate a positive energy towards your practice. Try leaning into your meditation – really engaging with it; increase the intensity of your focus to create an alert and bright mental state that’s clearly focused on its object of meditation.